Rollercoasters are even stable...at least the ones at Six Flags are!

Book I am listening too now: The 4-Hour Work Week by Timothy Ferris. I have read this book once before, but really didn't know how to apply the genius that is in the pages of this book to my life. So here I go exploring and picking it apart as I walk Stella on this bitter cold and dreary day.

To start off (this post as well as the book), Tim talks about feeling unsettled in the 9-5. Feeling like I you don't want to take the next 40 years doing the same thing waiting till you can retire. This seems like waiting for life to begin. But at the same time I want to be able to pay my bills, travel, have a savings account, perhaps even a family one day. What this seems to come down to is what am I so afraid of. What terrifies me and makes me want to give up on myself, or give up on my goals and dreams in life?

Fear is what stops me, it stops you, it stops everyone!

So why not just look at it. Let's take the current fears...MONEY, and not having enough of it. Okay in reality, the panic I face about only having $17 in the bank account feels exactly like the time I had $10,000 in the same account. So what is really going on? If it is the same feeling, it clearly isn't related to the number next to the dollar sign. My anxiety runs deeper than that, it is in the unknown that there is fear. In the unknown I could use $10,000 unwisely and then I would feel guilt. Just knowing that it will go away can cause more than enough panic. The $17 seems to instill the feeling of being inadequate. I only see the $17, not the fact that I am owed money, or that money is coming in, or the thrill of knowing I am working for myself, and there ARE GOING TO BE EBS & FLOWS to it (me attempting to drill this into my head). My mind will take what it will to ensure I stay in a state of panic. Like most of the world, I have this masochistic addiction to my self sabotage and suffering.